My boss, now a long time friend known as Danny Boy, taught me all I know about tree and plant identification. How to tell an Ash from a Persimmon or a Red Oak from an Overcoat Oak. Bull Rush from a Bull Nettle, or a good mushroom from a bad one.
The bad thing about Tunica County is it’s mostly fields but not much in woods. However, there were big woods on the business side of the levee. Mostly they’s Perry woods, but that’s a good thing, old man Toby Perry probably saved a lot of us.
When I was young I spent too much time farming with my dad. Big Bard. I was around lots of loud-mouths, like my Dad, at the International Tractor shop at old Highway 61 and Mockingbird Lane, in downtown Tunica. One day Cousin Craig – a young golden gloves boxer – had been to the Mid-South fair in Memphis. He was tellin’ us how the shooting gallery there had a back drop that was a wooded scene and every other tree had a posted sign on it “Posted TD Perry”.
All the workers laughed and said they didn’t have to worry about going to Hell cause Mr. Toby would have it posted. But talk is talk, and he was my friend, and his daughter was one of the prettiest girls I grew up with. Too much talk, like my Dad, back to the story…
Uncle Toby called Danny Boy for his free 50 acre Timber Cruise the forestry commission offered to land owners.
My running buddy, Chickadee, brother of Rooster, was my cruisin’ Buddy. We met Uncle Toby at the sand bar now known as Naked Beach, along with Danny Boy to start us on the cruise. In the first hour we saw 6 snakes and I said tomorrow we’d bring a gun. The next morning we showed up, both with pistols. Uncle Toby said “What you boys think you gonna do wit’ them guns? Not in my woods and with my animals.” We saw as many snakes as the day before. So I said we’d fix uncle Toby.
We were always shootin’ in my back yard. Plenty of empty shell cartridges layin’ around, and we picked up plenty, of all kinds. The next day as we were cruisin’ timber we’d drop cartridges in the road. Uncle Toby, when he see’d ’em, would look around some more, pick ’em up and smell of ’em. He put ’em in his pocket.
It was Friday so we only worked till noon. I stopped by Campbell’s Bar-B-Que to tell Marcudda the trick on Uncle Toby. Uncle Toby stopped there for a’ afternoon coffee, Marcudda was loaded and ready for Toby. Uncle Toby came in with his brow all twisted up and sat down. Marcudda came over and said “Toby why’s yo’ brow nettled so bad?”
Toby was plain worried and said “Got poachers in my woods. Found shells all up and down the road.”
Marcudda just laughed said “Toby you ain’t got no poachers, Tait Tate’s pullin’ a fast one on you. Since you wouldn’t let him take a pistol in your woods he figured he’d pull a fast one on ya.”
Well they say a mixed sort of look come over Uncle Toby’s face and he said, “That little fat bastard he sho’ got me. But I’ll get him better. I got plenty time.”
Tendered by,
Tait Tate
